Sacred Confession: 11 Marie-Ève Things

This is actually a little Facebook game whereby I am suppose to post 11—the number I was given—random things about myself.  I thought this was a good opportunity to go a little bit deeper with 11 personal confessions that I maybe wouldn’t otherwise reveal about myself.  Here we go…

1. I am a French Canadian who was raised in the Kootenays in B.C. and in Alberta.  While my family traveled to Québec a fair bit in the early days, I’ve never really had a sense of what it’s like to have an extended family.  I also come from a background of divorce and a blended family that ‘never blended’ on my dad’s side, leading to a really fragmented sense of immediate family too.  I secretly have always thought that if I wanted a family I would have to create it myself.

2. I’ve been battling Lyme disease since May of 2011.  It took 18 months to get a diagnosis and I finally found a proven natural protocol that takes 1-to-2 years to eradicate the infection.  I was told by a channeled spiritual Being that I had agreed to this period of illness before I incarnated and that it is part of my ‘soul contract’ in this lifetime.  According to this Being, my period of healing is the ‘seed in the dark soil’ of my life’s true purpose and my time of illness is almost complete.  This is by far the most excruciating and the most rewarding process I’ve ever been through.  I am not the same person I was before this.  My life has been completely rerouted and whenever I see people who knew me before, they tell me how different I look and feel to them.  This has been an initiation of such huge magnitude I can’t even describe what it’s done to me—I’ll save that attempt for another time.

3. In two-and-a-half weeks I will hand in the final paper for the first semester of my Masters degree in Counseling Psychology.  I wondered if I was taking on way more than I could handle with this intensive healing protocol I’m on, but I’m managing just fine and feel like I am in the right place.  As a Psychotherapist, I am inspired to offer support and hold space for those that are going through dark-night-of-the-soul experiences, healing from losses like chronic illness, or going through any experience that pushes one seemingly past their edge.  I know what it’s like for people to have no idea what you’re going through, for people to ‘not know what to say’, and I feel capable now of holding space for life’s toughest challenges and darkest undergoings.

4. One of my closest and dearest friends for the last 13 and half years is a cat called Miss Injeia (In-jay-ah).  She has lived with me in three different provinces, seen me through countless hard times, waited for me while I lived abroad, and celebrated my successes with me.  She was brought home by my boyfriend-at-the-time when we were living in Nelson, B.C. and she is one of the great gifts of my life.  There are no words for how much she means to me.

5. I seem to have become an introvert.  I’ve noticed over the last few years during my healing journey that I am increasingly drawing inwards and enjoy spending tons of time alone.  I feel that it is one of the most regenerative and nurturing things I can do and it also seems to be when my muse visits me and I get creative ideas.  I’ll be curious to see when I’m 100% well again how much I want to be out socializing.  I can’t even imagine performing on stage or frequenting tons of parties the way I used to.  Not sure how permanent this cocoon-like state is!

6. I’m a ‘knowledge addict’ and have a very active and hungry mind. I am constantly researching, investigating, wondering, and reading as much stuff as I can get my hands on.  I'm an 'ideas person'.  I’m into books and programs on spirituality, personal growth, natural healing, and lately I’m doing a lot of reading on ‘conscious relating’ and the ‘new paradigm’ of relationships.

7. I recently started charting my menstrual cycle and have found it to be so insightful and empowering.  I cannot even believe that they don’t teach this to young women in school! 

8. I used to run my own business teaching yoga, meditation, movement arts, and dance.  I’ve just recently resumed teaching one yoga class per week at Yoga Santosha in Calgary and while I don’t really see myself as a ‘yoga teacher’ anymore, I’m kinda falling in love with teaching the practice all over again.  Come practice!  I’m there Saturdays from 5:45 to 7:00 p.m. for a Hot Yin/Restorative class.

9. I am a total country-girl and wild woman at heart.  I dream of living in the woods, on an acreage where I can see the stars clearly at night, connect with the elements, and hear the wind in the trees.  I have my reasons for staying in the city for now, but I dream of having a garden with herbs, organic vegetables and fruit trees.  I long for a simple life of communion with nature, feeling my fingers in the soil, and my bare feet on the ground.  Ultimately, that’s where I’m heading.

10. I’ve always wanted to have children but it’s only very recently that I feel like that field of possibility is truly opening for me.  I know it’s not quite time yet, but I finally feel that I am emotionally and spiritually ready to be a mother.

I made it!  Eleven!  Hmm…what’s a good last one? 

11. I’ve always needed way more sleep than the average person and I have a really active dreamlife.  I’ve been playing with ‘lucid dreaming’ since I was a young teenager reading Carlos Castaneda and I regularly fly in my dreams by doing the ‘breaststroke’ as though swimming. ;)

There you have it!  

xo m.ev